Common Questions for the "Middle Wife"

As a traveling midwife I have the amazing privilege of seeing new countries and meeting new people on a regular basis.  I count this a tremendous blessing! I am always grateful for kind and caring new friends, who are full of curiosity regarding what I do.  I am reminded that midwifery can be a relatively new concept to many people.  Some of the common questions I get asked are:

Why do they call you guys “midwives”?

I had a sweet child ask me once if that meant I was the middle wife.  Although that would be a demanding job, nope, that’s not what being the midwife means.  I’ve also been asked, “Then where is your husband?”  Such questions lead me to believe that maybe a few things have been lost in translation.  Midwife literally means “with woman”.  In Old English wif means woman and mid means with.  So there you have it, us midwives are the ones who are “with woman” when it comes time to have that baby. 

But you’re so young…

While some people don’t even know what a midwife is, others who know sometimes have a few stereotypes in mind.  I’ve walked into more than one room and been asked, “You’re the midwife?  But you’re so young!”  I have not yet earned a full head of grey hair (Thankfully, as I am only 25) but yes indeed, I am the midwife.  Some of the world’s best midwives are grey haired women who carry more wisdom than I can imagine, but even they had to start somewhere.  As far as I’m concerned when it comes to being the best you can be at something, the sooner you start the better.

Did you just say, “Catch a baby?”

People often want to know how long I’ve been a midwife or how many birth’s I’ve attended.  Without thinking I casually reply, “ I caught my first baby about 4 years ago.”  Or “I’ve caught around 120 babies.”  This usually invokes a surprised response and some curiosity on why I would use the word “catch” when referring to assisting a woman at her birth.  Do we literally “catch” the babies?  Do they come flying out?  Do you need a fish net?  Have you ever dropped one?  I often let people ponder the mental image for a minute before I explain.  Midwives simply use this terminology over the more common word “deliver”, as it gives the ownership of the birth back to the mother.  Quite frankly I have never “delivered” a baby, that’s the mothers job and she gets the credit for it, not me.

Silent Epidemic

I returned to the hospital in Chuuk today to discuss my continued role as a volunteer midwife and was greeted by many familiar faces, who kindly welcomed me back.  Many immediately mentioned, “Did you hear about the measles outbreak?” or “So glad your back to help out with the crisis!”

It reminded me of the Ebola outbreak that is hitting many locations in Africa unrelentingly and the response it has drawn on a global level.  Whether it be the measles outbreak on our little island here in the South Pacific that will never reach global news, or the Ebola outbreak that has everyone talking, epidemics demand a response.  Epidemics scare people into action, for fear of what could happen if it is not controlled, for fear of the potential devastation that could come if a combined, strategic response isn’t implemented. 

In the past 2 months I have travelled through 5 countries including Canada, China, Philippines, Guam and the Federated States of Micronesia.  During these travels I have observed another sort of epidemic.  One I haven’t heard a whole lot of talk about, I haven’t seen people teaming up to combat it, and I have seen it affecting each of these 5 countries.  It seems to be a silent epidemic.  I wonder how many other countries are affected by it as well. 

What is this epidemic?  It is the loss of respect.  Maybe Aretha Franklin was onto something.  Respect is such a broad subject.  It can range from self-respect to respecting others, respect for creation, material items, life and death.  But lets not over analyze the word.  Basically respect is realizing that someone or something is important and valuable and treating it/them appropriately.  If you think about it, the loss of respect is a very dangerous occurrence that will dramatically affect our entire world. 

One of the areas where respect is so obviously lacking is the respect of elders.  I really want a t-shirt that reads in bold lettering, “RESPECT YOUR ELDERS”.  I boarded a metro in Shanghai, standing room only.  Behind me a little old lady hobbled on.  I looked around watching to see if any of the young, strong, healthy, electronically absorbed twenty something’s would take note of their elder struggling to stand in the aisle, jump up and offer their seat.  Sadly, by the time we reached my stop, the little old lady was still standing in the aisle.

I think about how many small and large scale decisions are made throughout the world on a daily basis without the input of the elders.  I don’t know how we can be so arrogant to think that our small bit of experience can somehow trump the years of life these incredible people have under their belts.  We are fooling ourselves.  It will catch up with us, and it’s gonna hurt. 

I could go on all day about where respect is lacking in our world.  But truly I don’t need to.  I believe you see this problem as much as I do.  You look around and see the human trafficking industry bombarding the world.  If we respected others, and ourselves would human trafficking thrive?  What about the way we waste precious resources without thinking twice about long term affects?  Or why nursing homes are full of precious people who haven’t been visited since who knows when.  I don’t even want to get into the effects of lack of self-respect.  Again, lets not focus on the issue, but the solution.  Taking responsibility for ourselves.  Responding accordingly to a serious epidemic.

Can we all be reminded that it truly is a problem demanding a response?  Look at your life, not the lives of those around you.  Do a respect self-assessment.  Do you see the importance and value of yourself, the people around you, and creation?  And do you therefore act out the appropriate treatment? 

Respect is seeing value and acting accordingly.  Maybe we need to open our eyes first to allow ourselves to see such value.  Slow down, put down your devices, look life in the eyes, see value, live respectfully.  

Act of Kindness

I sit down next to a Filipino lady and her two kids in the Manila airport, hungry and tired, without enough time to get food before my next flight. My passport is in my hand, as I fumble to get myself organized to board my next flight.

She glances over at me, noticing my passport and says, "Are you from Canada?"
I smile and respond, "Yes."
She smiles back, "So are we, from Vancouver." Her smile broadens, "Do you like Tim Hortons muffins?"
Strange question, I think to myself. "Yes, I do."
She nudges her son, who opens his carry-on to reveal a box of Tim Hortons muffins. They insist I have one. I don't argue. As squished as it was, It tasted delightful. This generous, kind and thoughtful act not only satisfied my hunger, but warmed my heart!

Thank-you God for this sweet lady, who knew exactly what this weary, hungry, travelling Canadian girl needed. Don't forget, your simply acts of kindness go a long way!

The Path of 100% Yes

By saying yes we walk through many uncharted territories. The journey is wild, unpredictable, at times scary and even painful. But it is on the path of 100% yes the path of surrender, and yielded heart that we truly discover our Lover.

 He is there, ever present, every step of the journey. There is no uncharted territory for Him. We discover aspects of His character we could only read about before. Now we experience them. There’s no step of the journey He doesn’t understand. The whole point is knowing Him. Discovering more and more of Him.

 There is hidden treasure. Inheritance that can only be discovered on this path of dying to truly live.  

As we love our family, care for the poor, sick, lonely, and imprisoned. Walk out destiny, calling and vision, we discover our Maker. Apart from our Maker this journey is pointless. He is the point. And His point is always love. And His love always transforms.